Okay so since my last post a lot has happened... If you follow me on twitter and instagram you have probably noticed I haven't been very active. Well that is because my health hasn't been very good.
At the end of April I started getting these weird unexplained skin pains on my legs, back and arms. They kind of felt like a mild sunburn but went as fast as they came... I always take note of things like this so when they got worse in May I definitely went to my doctor as quick as I could. By worse I mean I was bedridden, well I still am. Only able to get up to do the human chores. My body is in constant pain. The slightest touch can make me burst into tears. I've had moments where the pain is so severe that I have fainted which was then followed by a panic attack due to confusion and fear. The pain is so severe wearing clothes is agonizing. The blankets I sleep with feel like sand paper. Well wait what sleep... it hurts too bad to sleep. There definitely have been good days where I can get up and do more, but my energy exhausts quite quickly. It is like riding a roller coaster in the dark.
I've had blood tests, a X-ray, a nerve conduction test and a MRI and all came back clear, well except the blood tests - they showed that I am a Type 1 diabetic and we already know that LOL
Tonight I went to my doctor again to get the results of that MRI and he just looked at me and said "I see nothing... this is all clear. All of it has been clear. I think this is Fibromyalgia." Up to this point I've been doing a lot of reading and video watching and to be honest I am not surprised. "Do you know what Fibromyalgia is?" and all I did was nod. Because really there is no REAL description of Fibromyalgia but I am aware of it from all the stories I've read. I will have to go see a few more specialist to confirm it, but from what my doctor has heard me describe he is almost positive that is what I have.
So now for those who don't know what Fibromyalgia is I'll give you a brief generalized description. Fibromyalgia is known as the 'Invisible Disease'. Its most common symptom is widespread pain. The pain can effect many parts of the body and can be exhibited in many ways such as pain in the muscles, joints and the skin. It can be accompanied by boughts of fatigue, restlessness, problems with retaining memory and varying mood issues. That only scrapes the surface.
Treatments are all basically trial and error at this point for me. Fibromyalgia effects people uniquely so there is no ONE treatment. Many more doctor visits are in my future but now I at least have a name to stick to this so I can move forward towards getting better. For now I add 2 more medications to my daily intake and hope that they make a difference. Hope that I can be able to gain enough energy back to do the things I enjoy - like art, video games and spending time with all my wonderful friends and family. Laying up in bed all day with nothing but Netflix, Hulu and mobile games only keeps my interest for so long. YES I KNOW I have a switch, it's just really hard to get into a position that won't kill me to play it.
Feeling useless and helpless really takes a toll on the psyche. I have to admit there were times where I was laying in my bed alone crying, thinking that I was only burden to others and there was no light at the end of the tunnel and my health was only going to get worse. I always end up talking to myself afterwards saying I must trust in my doctors, they will figure it out. My friends and family are here - supporting me because they love me and want me to get better too. Thank goodness they are.
If you are still here reading this, THANK YOU. Thank you for taking time out of your day to read my ramblings. I appreciate you for it. It's been a rough few months, in fact 2019 so far has been a rough ride. If you have any questions or comments at all head over to my twitter and message or DM me there. Here is hoping to better days ahead.
~Love, Omikins~
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